The Time of my Life

Well, if you're doing a post about the wedding dance, there is only one song really ...
via GIPHY


But let's start at the beginning.
Back in medieval times, there would be dancing at weddings, but not as we know it.
For those of noble birth, there would be small entertainments throughout the feast, involving minstrels and musicians. After the feast (or sometimes between courses), the guests would join in the formal, structured dances of the time - like the one in A Knight's Tale.

For the peasants, it was more likely to be the local version of a "carole" - a chain dance with everyone joining hands  and moving in a circle to the left in an energetic romp. There may be a few percussion instruments like bells, drums and occasionally a lute or "gittern," like a guitar, but if nothing else, the dancers would accompany themselves by singing various songs.

The idea of the "first dance" originated in the middle ages, when the guest of honour normally performed a short dance with his wife as the grand opening to a ball. Research has brought up a number of different proposals for first dances:

• In 16th Century, a "country dance" would have been performed.
• In 17th Century France, it would have likely been a Minuet.
• 18th Century Debutante Balls frequently opened with a Cotillion.
• In Victorian Britain (19th Century), they preferred a Quadrille.
• In 19th Century Russia, a Polonaise would have opened an Empire Ball.

When did it become commonplace at weddings? Your guess is as good as mine.
I found this wonderful summary from Fiona Kelly:
"I love a first dance, however it’s done, and its particularly wonderful when it’s fun and heartfelt. A bit of action is always good to see, but a sweet dance between two people who are lost in each other is equally as lovely.
Sources I found tell me it dates back further to the days when the groom used to steal his bride and would show off his new wife to his friends by dancing her around the fire before the celebrations could begin. This evolved into the era when brides were bought from their fathers and the first dance would be a sort of fertility ceremony. Whereas now it’s generally considered a romantic moment, a continuation of a couple’s marriage vows to one another. Some couples find it a bit strange to have everyone stand and watch them dance, so often invite other couples to join in after the first verse and chorus."

And another photographer gave this advice: "Should you have the first dance at a wedding? The choice, Ladies and Gents, is entirely yours! But if you do decide to do something special and choreographed please please make sure to inform your wedding photographer and videographer beforehand!"

I would like to add another warning based on my own experience. The whole "First dance" thing was maybe not such a "thing" back in 1986, but whatever the reason, it didn't come up for us until the dj came to set up for the evening session. When he asked what to play for the first dance, my hubby and I named "our tune" - a song by Randy Crawford called "You Bring the Sun Out."
He didn't have it, so instead he played David Bowie's "Modern Love." It was horrible to dance to - way too fast, and I was a tad annoyed at the time, thinking he'd only picked it because one of the lyrics is "Get me to the church on time."
But I heard it on the radio the other day and my first thought was, "That was our wedding song." My second thought went along the lines of how cool it was to have a song by Bowie, who is a huge hero of mine, particularly since the movie Labyrinth (one of my top 5 movies), which actually released in 1986. There's some serendipity, right there.